Real Women, in my opinion

The Extra Penny ~ Real Women, in my opinion.
So last night there was some sort of basketball final on t.v. (I was pulling for Butler), so my usual Monday night line-up was totally interrupted. Instead of sending death threats to WHNT (given one of the anchors is my boyfriend), I surfed. I landed on, briefly….BRIEFLY one of the “Real Housewives of ______County”. I left that blank because I don’t know which one it was, nor do I care.
I am probably going to say what most of us think at this point. What’s real about that? I’m not talking about how these women look; they are absolutely gorgeous! Whether any of that is real or not is beside my point. I want to know, really, what is “real” about those shows? I watched one woman driving around in her very posh car, on her Bluetooth, totally bashing one ‘friend’ to another, then inviting the same ‘bashed’ friend to a party because "a party isn’t a party without her!” I wondered in what grade she felt perpetually stuck, or was trying to go back to?
Real women. That rolled around in my head a lot last night, and please keep in mind this is my opinion and I will probably leave things out, but the real women (housewife or working or both) don’t behave like that. Real women take care of each other. They bake casseroles when their friends are sick or have lost loved ones. They encourage their children and friends when the darkness seems too thick to cut through. Real women drive each other to the doctor ‘just for company’ or sense when they need to be there. They take care of ailing parents, while shuffling kids to games or doing their own housework while never complaining that they missed their weekly pedicure (who gets a weekly pedicure?!) Real women take responsibility; pick themselves up, move forward. They don’t make excuses to be bitter, but take opportunities to be better. The real women I know are often tired. They are content, happy, and tired because their plate is constantly full of making sure everyone else’s plate is full of “at least one good protein, a fruit and at least one green vegetable” (that won’t go to the dog). Real women watch over their divorced or widowed friends and offer to take their kids to give them breaks; or remember them at Christmastime when they feel alone. They stay up all night with sick kids and still go to work the next day. They do without, so everyone else can have what is necessary, plus a little extra. Real women take care of everyone while trying to schedule a sliver of “me” time to refresh themselves. And if they actually DO take a GNO, they will tell you it’s because they want to be better , recharged “for others”.
I am a far cry from being what I see to be the perfect woman. I have had so many wonderful role models in my life… my mom, my sisters, my own daughter, and my friends. I have fallen into the trap that magazine covers and “Real Housewives” show us how we should act and look, but I’ll never achieve that either…. And I’m glad I am past thinking that is real. I am glad that I have had several epiphanies over the last year that help me sort out what I consider to be real and not (Teachers: reality/fantasy). I am getting crow’s feet. I have cellulite. I have mood swings (some of you are going ‘Duh!’). But I love my friends and family and I strive to take care of them. I watch carefully the real women that I know, and learn from them. The one common denominator in all the real women I admire so much is that they are selfless. They aren’t concerned with what others think of them. They focus on others….others….others…
So when I switch on the tv and see “Real Housewives”, I snicker a little. I know those women probably wouldn’t last a day in the shoes of the real women I am so blessed to know.

Becky W.
April 5, 2011